[x]

A vegetarian headline:Cow eats man in self defence.

pretty boys break hearts.sometimes I think I’m just a mess of badly drawn lines. I’m just scrawled veins beneath paper rough skin, I wear poorly sketched scars on my thighs [skin deep red pen lines] and even my smile is lop-sided- but he never seemed to notice.

my skin [spread like thick icing over my skeleton] is a monotonous pattern of pores, a stretch of the world the sun never kissed. I can’t see the beauty in multitudes of freckles and chipped fingernails- but he does.

‘why do you love me?’

‘you make me happy.’

I never could figure out just how. was it my illegible love notes, or the tiny hearts I drew into his bare back wi

There is a place..There is a place where balloons end up after they slip out of the hands of a little girl as she gropes for the string that slowly drifts further beyond her reach. Sometimes, balloons just become untied and slowly float away until they are out of sight.

Haven't you ever wondered where balloons end up once they easily glide out of the hands of lovers, friends, families? A place where moonlight shivers as it touches lost memories and licks the sweet shining fantasies only to be infected. So beautiful, so deadly. Memories like mercury in the moonlight.

There is a place sound goes when there isn't a soul around to hear it. A place rain falls and

He stood there, stunned...The door had no push/pull sign.

never grow up.I have a monster living underneath my bed.

He’s made up of burnt frog skin, white-red cobweb veined eyes and a collection of missing pebble teeth. Sometimes we play scrabble.

(The first time he was just a mechanical hum beneath the bowing wooden planks, he was just a faint smell of green and he was just a hot cloud of fog around my lips. It’s the wind, it’s the wind, I breathed. Then he breathed back, heavy and loud and monster-like; AM NOT.)

He always spoke in capitals; MONSTERS ARE MUCH TOO SCARY FOR LOWER-CASED LETTERS, he informed me one night under pink covers. I shined the flashlight into his eyes until they changed co

i think it was a fridayI walked about 4 miles home while nursing a bottle of vodka.

I've seen these houses, these businesses, every day for years
but now they glow with that pre-dawn illuminance offered by
speeding drunks and cops and kids on pcp screaming down alleys
when I'm the only one who can hear.

I don't remember it raining during the night
but the puddles huddling against the curbs seem to remind me of something.
Something lost and stagnant like the abandoned bastard water that exists
without the rain to blame it on.

I left the party and the friends when I realized that I hated everybody there
and I took the rest of the hard liquor with me.
It do

C.O.D. The tattoos, they caught on incredibly fast. I mean, it only took about half a year after the Death-caster came out. That's what the press called it, the Death-caster. Anyway, about 6 months after the first televised prediction, these tattoos starting showing up everywhere. It went from fad to craze to routine. Everybody did it. You would get some blood drawn. The machine would quiver a bit and hum. You'd get your paper and you'd go straight to the tattoo shop. Pretty much everyone has their cause of death, their C.O.D., tattooed these days. The accepted place to get it became the top of your left arm. Every time you go to check your

Dear Diary,

I ate a sandwich today. I realized for the first time that one does not use a spoon to eat them. I was at the deli and I ordered my usual, a turkey breast with salmon, bacon, and teriyaki sauce, sat down and began to eat, spoon in hand. The man next to me turned and said, "You know… You don't use a spoon to eat sandwichs…"

This blew me away. All that I had known: destroyed. My world became swirling mist of the unknown. Every fact I thought I knew suddenly came into question. The way of the universe died that day.

The man grew concerned about the glazed look I had while I was shaking uncontrollably in my chair. I snapped to, spo

Unfinal SolutionJim and Dave shuffled down the street in the hot summer sun. Occasionally they would encounter an obstacle, such as a shopping cart, corpse, pile of trash, or burned out car. Depending on the size and nature of the obstacle, their zombie intellect would kick over into high gear, and a conversation such as this might ensue:

“Braaaaaaaaaaains….”

“Rains! Rains! Raaaaaaaains1….”

“Brains….”

If the object was large, such as a chunk of flaming airplane wreckage, Jim and Dave would do the Zombie Shuffle around its perimeter, sometimes bumping into each other and the obs

The Culinary Tastes of Aliens"What have you done?"

"The juices on your planet are delectable," he said, as though he hadn't heard her.  She looked around her kitchen.  There was blood and fur everywhere, and were those bits of bone?

"You ruined my juicer!"

He gave the appliance a dirty look.  "Yes. You should probably go and purchase one of higher quality."

She was afraid to ask, but morbid curiosity took over.  "What did you use?"

"I believe you call them 'squirrels'. Tomorrow I shall catch the avian you call a 'bluejay'.  If it tastes half as good as the squirrel I believe I shall stay here for a long time."

'What if?'"You like him, don't you?"

"Woah, where the heck did you come from?"

"You'd think that you'd be used to that by now."

"You'd think."

"You didn't answer my question."

"Yeah, I was planning on distracting you to avoid it, and now I forgot what you said."

"Liar. But I'm repeating it anyways. You like him, don't you?"

"Who?"

"You know who."

"..."

"..."

"I don't like him, he's more like a brother."

"What if pigs flew?"

"What do pigs have to do with my feelings?"

"I don't know. What if he were the last man on Earth?"

"Are we playing the what if game?"

"What if we were?"

"..."

"..."

"Ok, that's a yes. If he were the last man on Ea

Massacre of the InnocenceGeorgie Porgie threw an orgy
     just outside L.A.,
where Jack Be Nimble grabbed his thimble,
     outing him as gay...

Little Jack Horner bought Time Warner
     before the bubble burst,
though Jumping Jack Flash saw the crash
     and liquidated first...

Jack said Jill was taking the Pill
     to ward off impregnation;
the Three Blind Mice have lobbied twice
     for victim's compensation...

Little Miss Muffet had her tuffet
     liposuctioned out,
and L

250 christians can't be wrong

I.
The counselors tried to keep the children calm before meals. They lined them up by cabin in front of the dinning hall and preformed various stunts to pacify them until the tables were set. Sometimes they sang songs with hand motions:

"Baby Shark do do do do do do, Baby Shark do do do do do do, Baby Shark. Mama Shark do do do do do do, Mama Shark do do do do do do, Mama Shark, Daddy Shark do do do do do do…" The song continued to tell the story of a woman swimming who suffered a shark attack and flew to Heaven. It was an annoying tune with gestures that involved little more than clapping your hands together in a vertical snapping moti

Save The Whales"You know what?"

"No, what?"

"We should never fall in love."

"Huh? Why?"

"Well, it's simple, really."

"Explain it to me, then."

"We're opposites, you and me. You're the sun, I'm the moon. You are day, I am night. You're warm and you beat with the vitality of life. I'm pretty chilly and I beat my fists against the mirror for showing me reality instead of dreams."

"I still don't quite understand."

"I am a dreamer, and you are a dream."

"Thanks, I guess."

"No, listen--you're like the people who say 'save the whales'. You want to save the world, you want to do some good. You want to make a change, make a difference. And me... well, I'm

photographs of us.one.

the first thing i noticed about you was your smile. it pulled me in, and i was a fool for not resisting.

i guess you could say i loved your smile more than i loved you.

two.

we watched a thunderstorm from your porch, leaves and rain falling down, wind howling, thunder roaring.

you said the flashes of lightning were beautiful, and you watched them with your eyes closed.

but i couldn't bring myself to close my eyes, not even for a second.

i was too busy staring at you.

three.

we were standing on a bridge, watching the water run run run beneath us. fireflies danced in the air, playing a game of tag that i could only watch; never jo

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Proseburst 1: Just listen

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Winter, however, didn't get the memo and continued to harass a small country-town. For almost a week, winter's lone dark cloud had taken residence, pelting the townsfolk with a constant drizzle (the cloud saved on water so it would last longer). Jack Ardent didn't mind the weather; his mind was on other things.

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the silence before you say
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Three dialogsA series of dialogs
by Iscariot Priest

i. An unsightly matter

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Literature should not interpret literature."

I look up from what I'm reading, Philosophy's place in writing.

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She tosses a bottle of aspirin my way.

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You've been on my mind...

by `Iscariot-Priest, Jun 5, 2007, 5:54:29 PM
Literature / Prose / Fiction / Romance / General

Quite frankly, you're heavy. Get off.

You've been on my mind...by `Iscariot-Priest

Literature / Prose / Fiction / Romance / General

©2007-2013 `Iscariot-Priest

This is so not the thing to tell a girl.

=========================

A second DD for my six word stories, I'm floored.
Thanks to ~FelixT and ^StJoan for suggesting and featuring this.

If you'd like to voice a complaint, do so here [link] so I don't miss it. Thank you for your cooperation.

Daily Deviation

Given 2007-11-16

Eleven words can tell so much more that they seem to do.You've been on my mind... by *Iscariot-Priest has proven that, and made me laugh. A lot. ( Suggested by ~FelixT and Featured by `StJoan )

~~neutral 0 0~~

=NeoRabbitastic May 16, 2013 Hobbyist General Artist

Brilliant.

Reply

~dayran May 9, 2013

You, sir, made my day. Thank you.

Reply

Mood: Wow!

~MataRahi Apr 28, 2013

This is amazing.

Reply

*NinjaSkillz99 Apr 23, 2013 Student General Artist

You deserve every award there is. Just for this.

Reply

~JLestina Apr 21, 2013 New member Student General Artist

Love this!

Reply

~J158n Apr 20, 2013

XD

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Mood: Lmao

~KittycatKit Apr 13, 2013 New member

If a guy told this to me, I would date him.

Reply

Mood: Fear

~AutisticIcelandic98 Mar 23, 2013 New member

Am i really that heavy? I'm only 60 kg

Reply

~SilverMears Mar 22, 2013 Hobbyist General Artist

Lol that was funny

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~xanth-eyes Mar 20, 2013 Student Traditional Artist

awesome 0-0

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